I remember in one of my education classes, the
professor said that a parent never looks at her newborn child and thinks “I sure
hope he’s a loser and amounts to nothing in life.” That same parent doesn't send her son to kindergarten
thinking “I hope he fails and is a terrible student.” Parents send schools and teachers the best
thing they have: their children. They
trust us to keep their children safe and educate their minds and nurture their hearts
and souls. They trust us to care for
their children when they cannot. This anecdote has returned to me many times
over the years and always makes me smile for it is true.
After hearing about yet another school shooting,
this time at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newton, Connecticut, I wanted to
go pick up my babies from school and hug them tight. Instead, I waited patiently by the window and
raced to stand in the driveway as soon as their bus turned the corner. I saw Owen first and was sobbing
uncontrollably by the time Gav’s little feet touched the ground. Over the heads of my children, I made eye
contact with the bus driver and she gave me an all knowing nod as I hugged them
tight. She knew exactly what I was
thinking and knew why I was waiting in the cold. When we got inside, they both asked
why I was crying and why I kept hugging them and I said sometimes there are no
words to explain to children why an adult is sad.
My first lockdown drill as a teacher was just days after the Amish
school shooting in 2006. Owen was almost
three and Gav was four months old. As I stood
with my students, huddled in a dark room, I counted my blessings that they were
safe in my mom’s care. I was sobbing
silently among my students wondering what I would do if I was ever in a school
shooting myself. I shed tears for the
victims of such pointless tragedies and for the children that will never truly have
a sense of safety in school. Columbine
changed schools forever.
Now that my own children are in school, when we have lockdowns, I
still cry because I can only imagine what it must be like to be small and trust
that the adult in the room can protect you no matter what. They have no idea how fragile life really
is. I don’t want any children to grow up
afraid- much less worry about being safe at school. I cry, because I don’t know what I would do
if I was the one that had to protect innocent children. I cry, because I never want to find out what
I would do. I cry, because I hope that
my own children’s teachers are braver than I am.
As a teacher, I'm angry beyond all belief that someone destroyed the safe haven
school is for so many yet again. And for
the people that don't believe we need tighter gun control, please save your
argument for someone else. Until you've sat in a classroom with crying students
during a lockdown drill, I honestly don't want to hear what you have to say.
As a mother, my heart breaks for the families in
Connecticut. What will the 20 mothers
and fathers of the victims do this Christmas?
For what can they be thankful?
What will they do with the presents that are undoubtedly wrapped and
ready to be put under the tree? The
magic of the holidays was torn away by a selfish man with abandon much like the
wrapping paper from presents on Christmas morning. I’m left asking, like so many, “How could he? How could he hurt a room full of vibrant,
smiling faces?”
I can only hope and pray that from this tragedy,
some good may come. I stood watching
President Obama address our nation with tears flowing down my face. He’s right; we do need to take meaningful
action. We may not win the battle to
remove guns from the hands of people intent on harming others, but we can take
action in other ways.
- We can batter equip our
schools with safety measures to make entering them more difficult.
- We can throw off the “It
doesn’t impact me, so why should I care?” attitude. Be aware.
Don’t ignore the red flags.
- We can focus on what is most
important: our children. Love them,
guide them, and keep them away from the media.
Let them be children. Don’t
expose them to adult topics like this.
For if you do, more of the magic of childhood will vanish for
them.
- Thank the teachers and staff
members that work hard to make sure your children and grandchildren are well
cared for at school.
- Send cards and letters to
Sandy Hook Elementary (12 Dickenson Dr, Sandy Hook, CT 06482) to remind them we
are in this with them and we will not rest until schools are safe again.
These are actions we can take now.
